Bullying Who When Where What How Why?

Who?
Recent surveys are showing the amount of people who have experienced an act of bullying is increasing. Bullying is becoming too common, it is now estimated that more than half of school-aged-children have experienced a type of bullying.
Both boys and girls are bullied and are bullies. Boys normally act in a physical way where as girls are more likely to use sarcasm and exclusion over physical fighting and verbal abuse.

When and Where?
Bullying occurs nearly everywhere; schools are one of the most common places, but bullying also occurs in the workplace, at home, online and whilst participating in leisure activities.
Bullying often happens numerous times, each time the bully feels empowered and the victim becomes powerless.

What?
Bullying is the act of intentionally hurting another person.
How?
Bullying takes place in the following forms:
Physical Harassment: punching, fighting, kicking and tripping.
Verbal: name calling, threats and yelling.
Social- exclusion, ignoring, dirty looks, stalking and spreading rumours.
Stealing another person's item is another form of harassment.

Why?
Often bullies bully other people to feel better about themselves. Bullying is a sign of weakness rather than strength.

The act of bullying has serious effects on the wellbeing of children and adults; it can affect a victim's ability to feel safe and can cause a number of emotional problems. Being bullied can lower a victim's self-esteem and leave them confused, sad, feeling alone, angry and depressed. What many bullies don't realise is they don't just affect the victim, they affect the victim's family, the victim's friends and all of their peers.

If you think your child may be a victim, ensure you handle your child with care. Understand most kids do not want to admit that they are on the receiving end and they won't tell you straight out if they are being bullied. Look for mood changes and actions showing they are unhappy. Some of the warning signs of childhood bullying are: personal items missing, wanting to change schools or sports groups, deliberately walking a different path, and general withdrawal.

If you do find out your child is a victim of bullying listen to what they have to say and find out all the facts. Tell your child that you will deal with the bully, often kids who are being bullied feel scared, angry and sad, so let them talk and cry if need be. Boys show anger more often than girls; girls tend to get upset rather than angry.

If your child is the victim, locate a sport that they are good at and enroll them in a team or sports classes, this will help them gain confidence, anything that makes them more confident is great. After school activities will widen friendship groups allowing children to have a larger support net.

When choosing a school or sporting group, ensure that they promote a 'Zero Tolerance' policy in regards to bullying. Do remember that dealing with bullies are hard for not only you but the school- if the bullying is occurring at school, make sure the school is providing appropriate punishment.

Every adult and child has experienced some type of bullying, if they are not the victim or the bully often they will have seen it in the school yard or elsewhere. It has been said that children who experience a form of bullying can overcome it and normally walk out stronger and with more knowledge- they understand difficulties and know how to work to overcome them.

It is important that parents talk to their children about bullying as they will be affected at some stage of their lives. Parents have the power to reduce bullying.

Even adults hesitate to act when they experience a form of bullying, but it is important for adults to educate children who are witnesses to bullying that it stepping in provides a very positive outcome. There are many ways children can be a positive influence whether it be whilst the bullying is occurring or after. If a child supports a victim it will have a significant affect on the outcome of bullying. Ensure that children know not to laugh or provide any attention to a bully- this just encourages them.

Strategies for dealing with a bully:
Ignore- Ignoring a bully means they feel less empowered and often bullies will walk away if they don't receive any reaction. Anything that the bully does say, just ignore. Don't listen to them; although it's very hard not to listen, it is easier to walk away. If you know someone is a bully keep out of their way, if you ignore them hopefully they will ignore you and you won't have to socialise with them.
Imagine- If you are hurt by what the bully is doing or saying visualize the bully with a silly hat on or with their head exploding, this will help you ignore the bully and it will be easier for you to walk away unharmed.
Positive- Try to stay positive the whole time, think about what makes you happy and what your good points are; this will make you feel confident and less likely to be offended.
Talk- If you are bullied talk about it with your friends and family, explain your experience, as everyone has experienced bullying, talking in a group can be positive for everyone.
Friends- Surround yourself with loving friends and family. Remember your family and friends love you for who you are, who cares what one bully thinks? The bully is probably jealous of you!

For more information on bullying & related articles see:
www.girl.com.au/cyber-bullying-prevention-tips-for-teenagers.htm
www.girl.com.au/bullying-sexual-harrassment-in-the-workplace.htm
www.girl.com.au/bullyboss.htm
www.femail.com.au/cyber-bullying-a-parents-defence.htm
www.femail.com.au/workplacebullying.htm